Wednesday, March 2, 2016

The Eyebrows Have It

It's Wacky Wednesday time and the wackos sure are all over the internet with their conspiracy theories lately. Have you heard about the weirdoes who believe Katy Perry is actually JonBenet Ramsey? Seriously, some dude named Dave Johnson has a very convincing YouTube video outlining the conspiracy. He claims JonBenet was never really strangled in her Colorado home, there was no death, but in fact the little beauty queen grew up to become the pop star Katy Perry.
He goes on to say how much JonBenet's parents look like Katy's parents and superimposes images of the two girls' faces to show similarities between them.
 
Sure there are a couple of gaping holes in this theory like:1. Katy is about 6 years older than what JonBenet would be today; and 2. JonBenet's mother died of ovarian cancer in 2006 while Katy's Mom is very much alive. However, some other guy posted a separate conspiracy theory video in which he pointed out the shape of the eyebrows and basically says, "you are born with your eyebrows." "They are very close indeed". So now I'm convinced beyond a reasonable doubt that this is true based on first hand experience. Ya see, about 10 years ago some kid on the school bus asked my boys if they were brothers. They said yes. That kid said he knew they were brothers right away because they had the same eyebrows. Although we have gotten a good laugh about that for many years, there is obviously somethin' to this eyebrow thang. The eyebrows have it!
 
So did you hear the one about Ted Cruz bein' the Zodiac Killer? I'm tellin' ya folks, the only way to know fer sure, is to remove those glasses and study the eyebrows very carefully.
 
 
Story: Here


24 comments:

  1. I wonder how many killers and evil deities we could link all the current politicians to by eyebrows?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The next mud slinging campaign will focus on the eyebrows.

      Delete
  2. I thought Ted Cruz looks like Grandpa from the Munsters!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I guess the next time someone needs to remain incognito they will have to cover their eyebrows with big Jackie O sunglasses or tweeze the offending brow into a new shape. There are way too many wackadoos in the world.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Forget fingerprints and DNA, shave off the eyebrows and no one will ever know it was you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The new version of how to get away with murder.

      Delete
  5. Cruz is too much of a doughboy to do anything that would take so much gumption.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Yes, I ran across these yesterday! No need for any other type of proof. We can just compare eyebrows now!

    ReplyDelete
  7. as if the fact that she is a pop star isn't a mystery enough in itself :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. It's very likely the actual Zodiac Killer was born in America, making him more eligible to be President than Ted Cruz.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Cruz is much more dangerous than the Zodiac Killer. And uglier. What always cracks me up is the folks who remove their eyebrows and paint on some fake ones. Always looks weird to me.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Lol. This is too crazy! Katy Perry = JonBenet?

    ReplyDelete