Want that perfect potato every time?
Don't have to mess with grit and grime.
Not too soggy, not too dry,
Give Potato Express a try.
The hands free binoculars that look like sunglasses.
You don't have to tell anybody to move their asses!
'Cause you can see 300 times better than the naked eye,
The thangs you gonna see- Oh, My, My!!!!
Can't stand another hot, sleepless night?
You wake up in a sweaty fright.
Put this cold pack in your pillow and chill.
Sleep like a baby you certainly will!
No need to exercise or restrict your food.
Why that would be downright lewd!
Just put on this miracle belt
And watch your belly fat melt.
The safe and effective way to remove ear wax.
If you order now you may not even pay tax!
Love that screaming on the TV ad
What a damn wimpy Dad!