Thursday, September 19, 2013

What a prize!

CALM DOWN FOLKS!!!! No, I did not cross over to the dark side and become a Benedict Arnold to my team. Not that I have anything against the Vols, except that the ever annoying, and always pouting Peyton Manning came outta that program, but my allegiance will always lie with my beloved West Virginia Mountaineers. It's just that it's football season and this story about a fanatical fan auctioning off his step daughter like some half time prize was too awesome to pass up . Check out this ad that was placed on Craig's List, the mecca for Ted Bundy types chomping at the bit for their next prey:

Free Ticket! Tennessee-Florida This Weekend on the 40 – $1 (Sec 36, Row 19)
My step-daughter’s date backed out (his loss, your gain) for the game…
1 Free ticket for the Tennessee-Florida Football game this Saturday (cost to me, $150) on the 40 for the right gentleman. You must be an attractive, professional, single well educated gentleman, with a good sense of humor, 25-33. You also must not be threatened by an attractive, professional, single well educated lady, (as she is). If you do not qualify, please pass this ad to a friend.
The fine print: I lied! (Sorry…not totally free). Your cost will be a modest dinner, drinks and delightful conversation with her before or after the game.
P.S. (Being a Tennessee Vols fan is not required but is highly desirable)
Only those that respond with pictures and resume will be considered! Be creative!
9/17 3:55pm EDT updated info: due to the overwhelming response we have received so far, (and to the fact that we’re doing this completely off the cuff with absolutely no planning whatsoever) we decided to put a deadline on entrance. All entries must be in by midnight tomorrow (Wed) night EDT. A winner will be notified by 10 a.m. EDT Thursday. Thanks to all the respondents, and good luck!
I realize it's late in the game, but maybe some of you single players might want to apply. I'm sure they would make an exception for a top recruit! So apparently the guy is a die hard Vols fan who has never heard of StubHub. Call me a cynic, but if this chick can't get a date without her stepdaddy pimpin' her out on the personals, there's a reason. Probably because she's one of those hand to the hip posers. Granted I've been guilty of this pose myself, which is now a Facebook epidemic 'cause it masks your arm fat. But in general, ya gotta watch out for those types of girls who are trying to emulate Angelina Jolie on the red carpet. News flash, Brad Pitt already put a ring on it so he probably ain't interested. And why can't she just take a girlfriend, unless she doesn't have any? Sadly, I fear the next time we hear about this story we are gonna see some middle aged dude wearing a Tennessee Volunteer shirt on Unsolved Mysteries pleading for the safe return of his beloved, beautiful step daughter who was last seen on a beach in Aruba.

Story: Here

29 comments:

  1. do we get airplane tickets too?

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm hoping she's being consulted on this? LOL.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I did read a follow-up article, and while she wasn't callin' the plays, she was part of the huddle.

      Delete
  3. LOL and out will come the crazies. Unsolved mysteries should use craigslist, they`ll have an unending supply of candidates

    ReplyDelete
  4. I hope the guy that wins is some drunk, bald, morbidly obese redneck who lies and says he's really Zac Efron, just so she has to sit through dinner, drinks, and a full game with this guy. That's what you get when you look for dates on Craigslist, people. When will they learn?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think most of the Vols fans fit that description.

      Delete
  5. I has ta sez, I takes her to da game an bakcs, hole up, I ment ta hebuns and backs. I do luvs me sum whyte womans.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hurry up and send in your application!!!! Go for the Hail Mary!!!!

      Delete
  6. This makes me think of the commercial about the internet. The lady meets a guy who says he's French and he has a bowl cut, wearing a fanny pack and says Bon Jooour like a hick. This seems very desperate and dangerous. Thanks Stepdad!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I kept my older son in a bowl cut until 6th grade. He still doesn't let me live that down.

      Delete
    2. Whoa! That commercial was jive!?

      Delete
  7. I could nearly think that the stepdad pimp was drunk at the time he put this post up but the fact that the step daughter posed for that unfortunate picture...well this just screams of tacky. Whatever guy would answer this ad is heading into a train wreck...oh but wait...the kind of guy that is on Craigslist answering this ad loves train wrecks.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hand on hip posers are usually train wrecks. But like you said, any dude answering the ad is willing to board that crazy train.

      Delete
  8. I don't know what to say. I am attracted and repulsed at the same time. I mean, it's creative. There has to be credit for that. But, as Bryan said, they put it on Craigslist, which... I mean... DUDE! They put that on Craigslist? If you're going to be that creative, find a better venue.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Oh my Gosh! What is wrong with these people? Your Ted Bundy Types is spot on. This step-daddy ain't doing her no FAVORS.

    Glad you got to finally see the shiny squares! That dress is better in person. hahahahaha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Too bad Craig's List wasn't around when Ted was at his prime huh?

      Delete
  10. For real? Well now...this is an invitation for all the loonies to come crawling out from under their rocks. Or come out of their parent's basement :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Why is it that the loonies live in their parents' basements?

      Delete
  11. Hey, if it's on Craig's List, it HAS to be legit.
    Wonder how she feels about her dad being her pimp?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey, I did find some awesome free tacky Christmas décor on Craig's List.

      Delete
  12. You mean there can be problems dealing with purchases on Craig's List? Who knew.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I should get a Stamp... SMH!!! Wow!!!

    Just keep rollin' 'em out. lol

    Sorry I'm late, Slu

    ReplyDelete
  14. Interesting post :) Greetings and welcome to Us Patricia & Daniel

    ReplyDelete