Monday, August 12, 2013

Simon Says

Simon Cowell vacationing in Saint-Tropez with Andrew and Lauren Silverman in 2012.
Simon says I like to hang out with my friends and go on fancy schmancy vacays. Simon says it's great to have friends, friends with benefits. Simon says, actually old chap I fancy your wife, so I'm gonna take her for a spin while your fat arse sits in the back:
 Simon says two's company and three's a crowd:
Simon says thanks for making yourself scarce mate while I shag your wife:
Simon says, "Blow Me", I sort of forgot about the bloody birth control:
Now in 9 months Simon will say look at the chip off the ol' block:

Images via Google Images


  1. Mr No Talent now has a talent?

    Oh, thanks for defending me dear friend! Glad to know you would take care of any body roughing me up. lol. (hug)

  2. I have never liked this guy. There's something about him that grinds on my nerves. Could it arrogance?

  3. I'm not sure who's dumber, the husband for thinking it's great to let his wife hang all over this other guy ("I'm sure they're just really good friends") or the wife for thinking, I don't need birth control. I'll be fiiiiine.

  4. Simon says I should have called red rover over

  5. With friends like that, who needs enemies?

  6. I don't follow this stuff, so I don't know the situation. Did the husband not know what was going on? That seems unbelievable to me.

  7. Huh, I never saw that coming. Simon has always seemed like such a sweet, upstanding individual.

  8. Hahaha. This is the most hysterical post you've done since I've followed your blog (and they're all hilarious). Kudos, JustKeepinItReal! I was in stitches the whole way through. When I saw the first picture, I was wondering if Simon says "Shag the wife." Of course he does!

    Thanks for the laughs.

  9. He's going to be a little under 75 when that kid is grown up

  10. Who knew his little swimmers would be so strong!

  11. That last one is one scary picture.

  12. Sounds like he forgot to say Simon Says on the birth control part. But I heard he has done damage control by Announcing he knocked her up, is willing to pay her $XXX whatever amount in child support as a "Lookee here, Ain't I a wonderful person?" kind of display. Excuse me while I toss my lunch.

  13. Wear a condom. Simon never said that.

  14. Oh Simon, what have you done?

  15. Simon says, "I guess I'm a creepy ass cracker, too."

  16. Oops! That's what I get for not watching the news. It's a good thing I've got you to keep me informed! ;) *waves*


  17. Guess, ole Simon needs to take back the "never want kids" statement he made in an interview not long ago. What a putz...if he wants to screw around with someone's wife, it would be nice to go outside his group of BFFs.

  18. Holy hell I had no idea! Leave it to your awesome blog to fill me in on Hollywierd. :-)

  19. You are hilarious. This was brilliant.

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