Wednesday, January 30, 2013
An Oldie But Goodie
It's Wacky Wednesday time again folks and today I'm gonna tell ya about a gal who's an oldie but goodie. It seems this chick is usin' her senior citizen discount, not only to her advantage, but also for the advantage of her clientele. Ya see 71 year old Sygun Liebhart of Glastonbury, Ct, who also goes by "Lola", was arrested recently on prostitution charges. She was turnin' tricks for a mere $150 when much younger women were chargin' more than twice that much for similar services. Now that's an AARP bargain folks!!!! Wonder if you have to screw her before 5 pm to get the early bird special?
I really think Lola is sellin' herself short 'cause this lady of the evening has a lot to offer. Even though she needs to be home by 8pm to catch reruns of the Golden Girls, if she forgets to wear her Depends this golden oldie could also give her Johns a golden shower. That's a bonus baby that's gotta be worth more than what she's currently chargin'. Plus, she can use her denture cream as lubricant and her walker as leverage during sex. Obviously she's givin' dudes more bang for their buck.
Check out some of Lola's ads:
"Older is Better … A well preserved beauty. All natural and busty 38DD. Sexy, fit, warm and friendly."
"A truly mature escort with over 25 years experience in delivering a symphony of luxury and sensual delight to discriminating professional gentlemen both younger and older who can afford the best and who prefer their women a bit older but a lot better ... My background is French and German mix with soft beautiful skin, perfectly groomed from head to toe. Fine lingerie is a must to complete this picture of sensuous refinement and elegance," reads another "Lola" ad posted at eros-hartford.com.
Personally I think Lola looks damn hot for her age and I'm impressed she ain't wearin' granny panties!! I doubt many men would mind if she put on her favorite big band music to get in the mood and asked one of her elderly clients if she could use his cane as a vibrator. And rumor has it this chick was the first person to coin the term "Hoveround" as a sexual position instead of a power wheelchair. Atta girl, who says you can't teach an old dog new tricks? So seriously Lola, when you get outta the slammer ya gotta raise your prices to reflect your level of experience and the unique services you provide. As L'Oreal would proudly say, "you're worth it".