It's Wacky Wednesday time again folks and how 'bout those Jersey City law dogs fingerin' a suspect for carjacking, throwing bodily fluids at law enforcement officers, and being under the the influence of a controlled dangerous substance? But instead of just goin' down to the station to be fingerprinted, the dude got the munchies and literally bit the hand that feeds him.
Yeppers there's 29 year old Jargget Washington, who was high on PCP, tried to gnaw off his own wrist in a holding cell, shit in the back of a police car, then bit off his own finger and swallowed it. Mmmmmm, now that gives finger foods a whole new meaning hey? I suppose Mr. Washington may have been hallucinating and thought he was eatin' some chicken fingers from KFC 'cause obviously it was finger lickin' good! Or perhaps he had a chocolate craving and reached for a Butterfinger. Nobody better lay a finger on his Butterfinger baby!!
The good news is that the guy will now be able to free himself from those silly Chinese finger traps. The bad news is that the poor dude will only be able to count to nine on his hands. At least there's still enough left for a good ol' knuckle sandwich.
I wasn't able to ascertain exactly which finger the knucklehead decided to consume when he wanted a quick bite to eat. However, I sure hope it wasn't his middle finger 'cause everyone needs to be able to give the standard one finger salute. Plus, there's real power in flippin' the double bird!!!
Thank you so much to my friend Susan who hooked me up with the scoop for this post.