Wednesday, August 22, 2012

The Secret Life of Santa Claus

Welcome to another edition of Wacky Wednesday folks! Ya know I never really thought about what Santa Claus did on the off season when he wasn't makin' a list, checkin' it twice, and tryin' to find out who was naughty and nice. But I'm here to tell ya that Jolly Ol' St. Nick actually leaves the sanctity of The North Pole for a little R and R, and when he does, he lets it ALL hang out baby!!!!

Seems as if Santa prefers to use the sleigh only in the winter months. Come summer time the big man pulls his Hog outta the garage and heads south for a warmer climate. Looks like the Harley ain't the only hog in the picture. It appears Jolly Ol' St. Nick got a tad bit hot in his leathers and decided to strip on down so folks could see his belly shake like a bowl full of jelly. My dear friend Mindy had the good fortune of running into Santa at East Coast Sturgis in Maryland. When she came upon Kris Kringle without his traditional red suit, he said to her, "You want to take my picture, don't you"? OH HELL YEA SHE DID!!!!! I mean it's not every day that you see Santa at a motorcycle rally, naked as a jay bird comin' outta the shower. And who knew Santa had a big ol' tat on his arm? Now that just rocks!!!

Mrs. Claus did not accompany her husband on this trip, but instead felt compelled to stay behind with the elves who are servicing her needs while the ol' man is on VACAY. Hey, everyone needs a break from the daily grind ya know? Plus I hear the Mrs. don't like to be called "Harley Trash" when she rides on the back of Santa's bike. She is a refined lady after all.

Santa sure does make an impression on his Harley trike, and I imagine that was one heck of a trip from the North Pole all the way down to Maryland. Although rumor has it the skid marks that Santa leaves behind are not from his ride, but rather only on the seat. Good thing he's fully clothed when he takes the reins of that sleigh or Rudolph and the gang might petition for more sanitary working conditions.

So enjoy the rest of your summer Mr. Claus, and I'll be lookin' for ya to come down my chimney on Christmas Eve. I've been a REAL good girl this year. (wink) 

Don't forget to enter the fantabulous ELASTILash giveaway. The winner will be announced on Friday. Details Here

Mindy, you are da bomb girlfriend for sharing this picture and allowing me to run with it for Wacky Wednesday!!!

25 comments:

  1. Wow thinks must surely shrink until he gets to warmer weather hahaha and nasty seat, need some bleach.

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  2. that pic looks like it's from the 70's

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  3. Now santa enters the house through the garage door

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  4. Looks like Santa was trading in the nice for the naughty! Way too funny.

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  5. Oh wow. That's just something else there. What an awesome photo opp though!

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  6. OMG! A hog on a Hog!!! That picture is priceless. Like you, I'm expecting good things this year because I've been way better than other years, IMO!!! However, The Mrs. shouldn't be letting him out of the house like that!!!

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  7. Not sure just how "refined" Mrs. C is if she's being "serviced" by a bunch of elves??? ;)

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  8. Oh god, once you're seen something like that you can't unsee it! I'll never look at a christmas card the same way again!

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  9. I am really GLAD that photo was out of focus! You are so nice to compliment me on my photos. I just have luck, I think. But you are giving me confidence, that's for sure. :D

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  10. I swear that is not my picture on the bike... it's not... it's not I say!

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  11. You know you need to lose a few pounds when you don't need a censor bar because your fat folds cover your genitals for you. Eww.

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  12. I could have sworn that I left a comment on this yesterday! Either way, it made me laugh twice now :) lol

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  13. What a treasure. That seat should be destroyed and Santa needs Weight Watchers for Christmas.

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  14. Let him have his fun. If he tried doing that in the North Pole he'd get butt-raped by a Walrus.

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  15. oh my gosh...my kids would be shocked to know the truth!

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  16. Oh, words can not explain how something like that even happens. Just...what the eff!

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