It's Wacky Wednesday time again folks, and when I saw this article on my friend Rossie's Facebook page, I just KNEW it was Wacky Wednesday blog material. It appears that not every boy scout lives by the sacred motto, "Be Prepared". Poor Normand Brousseau, a boy scout leader, was swimming in a Pennsylvania river when a rabid beaver swam through his legs and bit him in the chest, leg, butt, arm and torso. I realize it's difficult to imagine the words "beaver" and "boy scout" in the same sentence, but be that as it may, if Mr. Brousseau had "been prepared" like the boy scouts had taught him, perhaps his injuries may have been less severe.
First of all, ya gotta know how to treat a beaver. Most beavers like to be gently caressed, stroked and massaged in their sweet spot in order for them to behave nicely. Beavers are very temperamental creatures, but once you figure out how to please them, you really got 'em in the palm of your hand. You definitely don't wanna play rough with a beaver, 'cause that's when them bitches get all crazy on ya and start foamin' at the mouth, which explains the rabies diagnosis in this situation. Plus, if Mr. Troop Leader was spazzin' out and flailin' around that just makes a beaver clamp down even harder to keep things goin' at a nice and steady rhythm.
Second, you NEVAH invade a beaver's den uninvited. Oh no mister!!! Just like a den mother who is fiercely protective of her cub scouts, so too is a beaver protective of its personal space. You need to wine and dine the beaver a bit, do a little of that smooth talkin', make that furry thang feel a bit special before a beaver is gonna allow ya to get into its den. Otherwise, that beaver gonna sink its teeth into ya where the sun don't shine, and them beaver teeth just ain't purty.
Now I imagine Mr. Brousseau earned himself another merit badge in beaver handling, or something of that sort, for his courage in warding off that rabid animal. Of course anyone other than a boyscout would just put another notch on their bedpost after a raucous night of beaver handling. But hey, a badge is a badge people!!!! And in another act of bravery, other boyscouts at the scene did in fact use rocks to kill this large rodent that day. Right there folks is the boyscout version of a beaver shot.
Unfortunately for Mr. Brousseau, I understand that rabies shots are more painful to endure than the VD shots that might have been necessary with other type of beaver infections. Just to be on the safe side, perhaps using a beaver dam (aka condom) is the best way to teach all boyscouts to "be prepared"!!!!!
Images via Google Images
Thank you so much Rossie for the awesome blog material!!!