Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Anderson WTH?????

Anderson honey, what the hell???? Gay???? Seriously???? I believed you when you took me in your arms, looked at me with those gorgeous blue eyes and told me I was the love of your life. You told ME I was the ONLY person you would ever love, the ONLY person you cherished with your whole heart and soul. We were going to have beautiful children together. I hung on your every word when you enticed me with your worldy travels and your escapades as a front line journalist, just like a devoted lover should. Sure it was all in my dreams Anderson, but MY GAWD they were seriously orgasmic dreams. And damn dude, the things you could do to me like NO man EVAH could were mind blowin'!!!! Yes, I've heard those rumors before, but I just never believed them 'cause I believed in you and me baby!!! Somehow, someway, someday WE would be together!!! So how could you now be playin' for the other team when I have this entire fantasy life built around you and me FOREVAH??????

Yes folks it's true. My fantasy guy Anderson Cooper came out yesterday and I'm officially in mourning. I'm wearing black until he comes to his senses and realizes I'm the only person for him. I'm makin' it my mission to turn my man straight.

Just give me one night Andy and I promise you won't have any regrets. I realize you are into pitchin' and catchin' now, so if you are ready to throw out that first pitch, I'm your All Star catcher baby!!! 

Story: Here

10 comments:

  1. are you needing someone to pack your fudge love?

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  2. This was least well kept secret ever. I too had fantasies of Anderson Cooper stemming back to Jr High and his intrepid reporting on our force fed Channel One news program every morning, but even then, I knew... it would never be. Sigh...

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  3. Least surprising coming out party I've heard about in a long time. Even since I saw him hosting New Years Eve with Kathy Griffith and he was giggling like a moron I knew he was gay.

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  4. Yet another swarthy, manly brute of a man lost to womanly love. Sorry darlings. Hmmmm, for a small fee I will put on a charcoal grey suit and with a microphone in my hand allow you to "love me up" I suppose. Just until you are past this tense moment in history. (he likes to help that way.)

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  5. luls... Love the post!! :)) Sowwy yo main man is swanging for the other team now (or however that sayin goes).

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  6. Now you know how all the women who idolised Rock Hudson's felt. Maybe it's time to get your gaydar retuned.

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  7. Sadly, I've known this for a long time. But I still stubbornly love him anyway! He is a beautiful man!

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  8. LOL I've heard about this and all I could say was "who?"! lol I have no clue who this guy is, but I do know his preferred sexual orientation. hahahaha

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  9. You have my condolences, sweetie. I know it's a horrible thing to learn, but I have faith you'll be able to recover ... in time.

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