Saturday, June 9, 2012

This Shizz Called Rap Ain't Nuthin' But Crap

The past 3 years of my life
have been filled with hardcore strife.
My kids have a new fondness for rap.
I, on the other hand, think it's total crap.
All I wanna do is turn off that freakin' hip hop nation.
And go back to jammin' on the cool pop station.
I just don't see how my two boys
Can put up with all of that useless noise.
Gangstas sure do like to cuss!
It's no wonder I put up such a fuss!

When I hear songs from Lil Wayne
All it does is cause me pain.
People like Drake, Rick Ross and Nicki Minaj
MY GAWD, I wish they were all just a mirage!
Regardless of the sweet sound of his name,
I hate Eminem all the same.
Then they turn on someone named Mac Miller,
And I think, "Damn, that dude's gotta be a killer"!
Need I even tell you how I feel about Chris Brown?
His extracurricular antics just make me frown.
Kanye West will tell you he's da best.
He seriously causes palpitations in my chest.
Then when I hear someone like Jay Z,
I get on my knees and say this merciful plea:
PLEASE GOD, I HOPE THIS RAP CRAP IS JUST A PHASE.
AND MY KIDS MOVE ON TO THE NEXT LATEST CRAZE!

This post was written in response to Trifecta's writing challenge in which the writer was to post a creative memoir about a period in their life that can be identified by the number 3.
Images Via: Google Images

19 comments:

  1. This is brilliant! I love it. My eldest went through a few "music" phases. The first one was where he liked the same music as I. The second one - which came after all of my CD's got the crap beat out of them - was German Industrial Heavy Metal. Listening to Rammstein 24/7 is enough to make suicide seem somehow appealing.

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  2. Can you now please please record this as a rap and post on youtube?? I would love you forever and a day :)

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  3. Oh, how I love this! The judge from the Nation of Galtopia gives you a 10 for inspiration and a 10 for execution.

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  4. I try hard SO hard to like stuff. And I don't know if it's because my evil sib was such a rap fan or what, but I only like a very little bit of rap. But then, I don't like a lot of modern pop, either. In fact, I'm just a picky music biatch, come to think of it. I don't mean to be, really, but I am.

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  5. Thanks for linking up with Trifextra this weekend. I'm sorry that your life has been hijacked by a bunch of rapping gangsters. :-) It must be awful to be subjected to music you can't stand. For that reason, my children have never listened to children's music. Ugh. Hope to see you back soon.

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  6. Rap is awful. It's very rare for me to like rap, hip hop, or R & B. I had to listen to a station at my last job, and that's all they played. I'd change the station if I got there first, and people would whine about how horrible country music is. I finally piped up and said, "Trust me, your hip hop people whine worse than my country folk these days. We call it 'twang'. And at least I can fucking understand my music."

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  7. I'm not a huge fan of rap, although I have to disagree with Nicki Minaj and Drake. I like them. Their songs are just way to catchy, and Drake has a sexy voice. But, everyone else I can do without ;) lol

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  8. I'm not a fan of rap, either. (Of course, the 'awful' music isn't limited to just rap). I have to laugh, though, because I think parents hating their children's music happens with every generation.

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  9. Ahhh! Love this. I can tolerate *some* Jay-Z and I like Drake but Rick Ross and Lil Wayne. UGH!!!! It's all such garbage.

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  10. I am selective about my rap - LOL! But, it has to be a bad influence... Our rock lyrics were bible verses in comparison to this stuff...

    Thanks for commenting over at my place, BTW :D

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  11. You NAILED my feelings exactly. My 21 year old is coming around (she loves country) but my 19 year old dude is still punishing me. For what? I don't know. Way too clever.

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  12. Rap is angry chanting, not music. Use it scare off the coyotes and raccoons.

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  13. I feel your pain. Sometimes I think my son chooses the songs he likes based on my face when I hear them.

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  14. My kids aren't into rap but they ARE into blasting their music at all hours of the day. I used to get angry. Then I remembered how I used to blast Depeche Mode when I was a teenager.

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  15. A guy who works with my wife said that Lil Wayne is one of the greatest musicians of our time because he writes his own songs. It took all I had in me not to just punch a hole in his face.

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  16. Word to to your mother.
    I hope Rap ends up like Disco.

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  17. Ya gotta good rap going on there tho woman! lols. I never got into the whole rap scene. I'm hoping my daughter doesn't either. I may have to move us to a place where there is no rap. We be AMish or something, lols...

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