Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Who's Got Big Balls?

It's another edition of Wacky Wednesday folks, and since I wrote about cooters yesterday, I thought it was only fair that I talk about some male genitalia today. I sure don't want the guys who visit my site to feel slighted in any way. So dudes, does summer time conjure up visions of the beach, sand, surf, bikinis and suntan lotion? OH YEA, how about some beach balls?????? Check out the story below that my friend Erin shared with me:

Now that gives beach balls a whole new meaning huh? First of all, is it really comfortable to sit on a deckchair with your nuts hanging between two slats, regardless of the fact that they have a shrinkage issue? HHHHHMMMMM that would be like us women folk laying face down with our tits wedged between two slabs of wood. Most chicks would not be diggin' that. So then when his love spuds started expanding back to "NORMAL" size, ya mean to tell me he didn't feel any pressure from the slats and try to rearrange his entire package? That's just not typical male behavior folks. Guys never seem to have a problem reachin' down, scratchin' or movin' things around. So I'm thinkin' this dude LIKED IT!!!! UH HUH, he got off on it like some sort of testicle clamp. Talk about a ball buster!!!! He got more than he bargained for outta his little S&M activity. 


BUT DAMN, Mr. Visnjic must have some giant fucking "normal" sized cojones for them to get stuck between the slats of a deckchair. I can see why he was swimming naked 'cause there ain't no way he's gonna be able to stuff his gargantuan gonads into a teeny weeny speedo. He would have a nasty case of man-toe or camel foot if he EVAH tried sportin' any type of bathing suit. Now the dude is really missin' his claim to fame, 'cause he needs to be listed in The Guinness Book of World Records for the world's biggest live beach balls. MY GAWD, when he slaps his salami think of the geyser that must shoot out when he reaches his happy ending. Run for cover folks 'cause you sure as hell don't want to get caught up in that tsunami!!! 

And LAWD, some people are SOOOOOOOOO dramatic!!!  Calling beach maintenance on your cell phone to have them cut the deckchair in half to free your family jewels?????? "Security, Security, please send help. My nuts are stuck and I can't get up". Why cause such a scene??? Has Mr. Visnjic never heard that you can use your chair as a flotation device? Just pick up the chair, get back in the cold water, have yourself a good ol' time splashin' around on your own personally attached floatie, and when your beach balls shrink from the cold water, VOILA, the chair will magically drift out to sea and your manjigglies are free at last.

Either way you look at the situation, I truly can not think of a more appropriate way to end this post other than with some AC/DC "Who's Got Big Balls". ROCK ON!!!


As always, thanks so much Erin for the scoop!
Images  Here and Google Images

15 comments:

  1. Sometimes there just are no words...you have rendered me nearly speechless. That itself speaks volumes!
    Oh and I sent you an email about guest posting at RG but not sure if you got it. Let me know mmmmkay?

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  2. MANJIGGLIES!!! I am laughing my farking head off right now.

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  3. bwhahahaha.. I will say I loved this post. Who does this?!! Dayum!

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  4. I really hope they either disinfected or just threw out that lawn chair lol

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  5. Kinda jealous. I want to be able to tell people that they had to use the Jaws of Life to secure my balls.

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  6. I have to start reading your stuff at home, b/c you crack me up at work. hahahahaha That does sound slightly uncomfortable! LMAO

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