Monday, April 23, 2012

Muffler Diving

Hey guys, does the sight of that shiny, silver muffler give you a rock hard boner? Well apparently it is a definite turn on to at least one dude in my local community 'cause he was found shagging a car muffler in one of our local parks. Yeppers, I heard it straight from an esteemed member of an elite crime fighting task force who took a solemn oath to support and defend the constitution of the United States. Believe me, when this man tells ya something, you stand up straight and listen 'cause ya don't want him EVAH knockin on your door!!!!!!

So yea, some wacko was actually fucking a car muffler. I've heard of muff diving before, but never muffler diving. Folks he's truly takin' the phrase "layin' some pipe" literally!!! Now I'm thinkin' the dude must be seriously well endowed to actually get his rocks off on a muffler. DAMN, I know girth is more important than length in the grand scheme of things, but that's just takin' width to an entirely different level. That guy must have the Midas Touch fo' sho. Can you even imagine the circumference of the guy's dick who would think it was pleasurable to screw something of that nature??? Whew, after a lay like that, he must have been EXHAUSTed.


Perhaps the muffler was a tighter fit like this one. Almost virginal don't ya think? And MY GAWD, I certainly hope the car had been turned off for awhile, before Mr. Sicko started bumpin' uglies 'cause a third degree burn on his pecker just ain't gonna be purty no matter how ya look at it. Now what about the poor car? It has no legal recourse for rape. It can't testify against the guy in court. I suppose if the car had super powers like Herbie the Love Bug or Kitt from Knight Rider it could have shifted into reverse and run over the wack job. Talk about coitus interruptus!!!! 

Holy shit, if that crazy bastard ever saw a vehicle like this, his dick would be bustin' outta his pants 'cause ya know he's thinkin' foursome baby!!!!!! TOTAL ORGY!!!!!! WHOO HOO!!!!!! LAWD, I just hope this dude practices safe sex 'cause we sure don't need our parking lots in little ol' Wilmington crawlin' with STD's.

Images via Google Images

7 comments:

  1. Picturing Sarge leading the team of sperm...come on boy's let's get up to the berm now and take that uterus bunker, now!! Er, Sarge something don't feel right about this...yeah, Sarge I know what he means. Look at this surface. This ain't right. Shut up you apes, and move out!!! (fast foward - mission failed. No survivors)

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  2. This reminds me of the previews I've seen for a show on TLC about people with weird obsessions. One girl ate nail polish another duh in her ears with scissors. Then there was the guy who was in love with his car. *Very* in love. It's a true SMH moment.

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  3. I assure you, the thought of firing up my car and flaming hot sperm launching out the back pipes is nothing short of horrifying. Do they have rape survivor helplines for cars?

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  4. The logistics of it are totally baffling, I mean how did he get everything lined up? What happens if the car is slung too low? What about SUV's - would they be too high up or just right? Here I thought tall guys dating short ladies had stuff to work out.

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  5. I've found myself in a few embarresing moments after a night of booze, but holy hell! WEll endowed or not, you gotta be drunk as shit to enjoy cold hard metal like that!!!

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  6. Oh my muffler!!!! hahahaha I'm willing to fight for the justice of these cars. Everyone should have a choice!!! lol

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