Have you ever gone grocery shopping and found yourself sharing the aisles with the same person over and over again? Such was the case with me the other day as I was doing my big Sam's Club shopping. I kept seeing this one particular family. They were an imposing bunch in the amount of space they were taking up in each aisle because they had 2 shopping carts. One shopping cart held 2 toddlers in the very front, much like the picture above except they were facing outward, or backwards so I could see their tiny faces at every turn. The main compartment of that cart was taken up by a baby locked in a baby carrier. The other shopping cart held all of their items they were going to purchase. There were 2 women accompanying these 3 children.
Now as I made my way around the store it seemed as if I kept running into this particular family. They always seemed to stop at every food sample station and I had to navigate my cart around their 2 carts. All fine and dandy. I had my list and I was on a mission. I never really thought much about it until I was directly behind them in the check out line.
As they are placing their items from the one cart onto the check out belt, they open up their $4.99 rotisserie chicken and just start chowin' down right there in line. Each toddler gets a leg and is just happy as a clam. The women are rippin' into the chicken, lickin' their fingers, all the while just placing their industrial sized package of toilet paper, frozen raviolis and tampons onto the belt. I'm lookin' around wondering if no one else is thinkin' this is a bit strange except me.
But then it clicked. These women are fucking geniuses!!!!! They just fed their kids and themselves for under 5 bucks, got a bunch of free appetizers, didn't have to take the kids out of the cart, got all of their shopping done while filling up their tummies and they are on their merry way. Talk about the queens of multi-tasking. Brilliant idea!!!!
Now I have 2 growing teenage boys so I'm going to adopt their method to suit my own personal style. I hear the free samples are better on the weekends, so I'm takin' my kids to Sam's around dinner time tomorrow to stock up on all the free appetizers. Then I'm thinkin' we will "borrow" one of their nice shiny grills to fire up our juicy steaks we just purchased in the meat department. No sense puttin' the wear and tear on my grill at home when they got 'em right there in the center section. Plus, they got all the comforts of home at Sam's. Hell, I can try out a folding chair, a lounge chair, or even a desk chair while my steak is grillin'. My boys can toss around a football or a Frisbee 'cause they got those too in the toy section. Seriously, may as well make a night out of it. I can grab a DVD or two, pop it into one of their DVD players and watch a movie. They even have microwave popcorn and microwaves so I'm set for the entire evening. Oh and let's not forget their awesome selection of beer and wine. I'm tellin' ya folks, those ladies who lunched on the go taught me a lesson I can certainly use.
The only thing Sam's Club is lacking is an after hours activity department. I'm reading "Fifty Shades of Grey" right now and if Uncle Jeffy and I want to act out any of the scenes, we need a fully stocked hardware section. I guess I'll have to talk to management about that.