Sunday, November 13, 2011

Red Wine and Real Regrets

What is it about red wine that just makes you do crazy shit? I mean there is nothing bettah, than a fine glass of red wine, with a big, juicy steak, or just sippin' a glass by the fire on a cold winter's night. But DANG, there is a fine line between the good stuff and the cheap crap that makes you go plum crazy!!!! Or perhaps it is the amount you ingest no matter what the quality.

I can remember one night my friend Collette and I closed down a local establishment after a few too many glasses of red wine. The bar tender thought it was a great idea to invite me behind the bar and mix up a few slippery nipples. Don't need to ask me twice Mister!!! I started throwing the silver cocktail mixer in the air like Tom Cruise in the movie "Cocktail" only to miss catching it and causing quite a mess all over the bar and my new silk blouse. Not to mention I couldn't exactly pour the contraption into the glasses. Guess I'll never make it as a mixologist.

And maybe it's just women, or perhaps it's just my particular group of friends, but after a few glasses of red wine, the conversation invariably turns to sex. Now in my opinion that is the best advantage of drinking the red stuff!!!! Last night I went out to dinner with my friend Heather. We had a few glasses of red wine, and yeppers, the conversation turned to sex. And I'm talking belly busting laughter over one of her former boyfriends who stylized his own version of "The Porn King Move".

Of course let's not forget drunk dialing, tipsy texting and a new one I discovered last night. In my red wine haze I accepted a facebook friend request from a guy I don't even know, who says he's single and interested in women. At least we have more friends in common than just Kid Rock.